General

Speak No Evil, Hear No Evil

It seems that most dominants and sadists want their submissive, bottom, or slave to be vocal while receiving pain.  In fact, I've even read a lot of things online here and there about the fact that, during a beating - if the bottom is quiet then they obviously have ego issues.  They want to appear brave and take the beating silently.  For some, this may be true, but a lot of people neglect to remember that as slaves, we are each trained differently.

I've played with a couple sadists and a few doms beside my own Master on occasion.  As they love to hear crying, or screaming, or whining in a lot of cases, they will begin hitting me with a pretty firm hand.  I'm really good at being able to handle pain though, and you're not going to make me cry in as little as a couple of strokes...  Most of the time.  If crying is the actual goal of a session, Master will take his time, and we'll get there slowly, after a whole lot of warm up and play.

Other people aren't willing to wait so long for me to cry, and if I do not cry out or sound like the strokes I'm being given hurt me, they will deliberately skip the warm up and just beat the shit out of me until I do.  Master has spent a long time training me though, and teaching me how to keep quiet unless I'm in severe pain.  Bottom line, you're not going to see tears or hear me cry or do anything but moan unless you take me from zero to one hundred, or we've been at it a while, and I've hit my pain threshold.

Why has Master trained me to be this way?  For a couple reasons, I'm sure.  The first one being: it pleases him.  That's really all I need to know, but as this is something I felt like bringing up, I'll talk about some other reasons that ring true for us.

For another reason: it is difficult.  I can take moderate to heavy blows without uttering a peep most of the time, but some days I have trouble even sitting through vampire gloves without moving, or getting candle wax dripped on me, two things which I consider to be pretty low on the pain scale on their own.  (Obviously dripping wax over sensitive places, or on tender flesh after a beating will hurt more.  As will drawing blood with the vampire gloves or spanking with them, rather than drawing them slowly across skin.)  For Master (and I enjoy it as well), the challenge of the internal struggle I face to not move, or to behave when I really don't want to, or to remain silent during a painful session of some sort is much more fun than the typical jumping around that many other slaves are trained to do.  I would sooner chip a tooth (been there) than cry, in most circumstances.

I do want to say, that crying itself doesn't signal the end of a session always either.  Sometimes it is merely the beginning. Sometimes we do go from zero to one hundred, though those times are rare.  Sometimes it is a test.  Sometimes tears will mean that we're done.  It all depends on what Master wants.

Is it still fun to watch others play the way they choose to play?  Of course!  But, when Master and me are the players, and no one is watching (and Hell, even when they are), this is what makes us happy.  Do I have a big ego because I try to remain silent?  No.  I'm merely following my Master's orders the best that I can.  For some it is an issue of ego, for others, this is just another part of the game.

Wax and Sisal Rope

The things which excite Master are circular.  We could have candles sitting in our toy chest for years, and he won't be the least bit interested in them.  Then, suddenly, candles and wax are incorporated into everything for a couple weeks.  That's what the last week has been like.  Our play started off innocently enough.  He had me kneel (then, sit crossed legged once my legs started going numb) on the floor on a pillow.

Arms Bound With Sisal

He put my advanced nipple suckers on me, which hurt a lot.  I had just started my period, and my breasts hurt very badly before he even started to play with me.  Normally, I don't find the advanced nipple suckers to hurt me very badly.  It feels nice and suction-y, and a wee bit pinchy.  These felt worse than aligator clamps that night.  Go figure.

Master started to play with my nipples, and breasts, and after a couple of minutes he told me to lean back so he could make me more uncomfortable.  I did so, and felt something a bit spiky (but not overly so) between my legs.  He had put the toilet bowl brush attachment from our interchangeable gag kit between my legs, though  I didn't know it until after he told me, later.

Sisal Rope On My Calves

After he had his fun with me from the front, he told me to lay down on my tummy, and I could feel him working on my calves with the sisal rope.

I love sisal rope.  I only learned about it this year, but it is so fun.  It is a much different texture than other ropes, including our hemp rope, which is scratchy too.  Sisal rope has these delicious little spikes on it which seem harmless at first.  As the tie goes into place, those little spikes start feeling a whole lot more appealing.  After a while I start to feel as though I am bound with needles.  Delicious.  One thing which I really love about rope work in general is that inescapable hug sensation.  I see other ropes as feeling like you're hugging a dom.  Sisal is sort of like hugging a sadist.

 

Before The Wax Started Dripping

After Master got me all roped up, he started dripping the paraffin wax we have on me.  I love the hot drips, and feeling them makes me squirm a little, even though I try to contain it for Master.  He likes a still kitty.  Things really got fuzzy after the wax started pouring, so I don't remember all of what we did.  (Though, thankfully there are pictures to remind me, this time).  I do know, that after some time, Master put a vibrator between my legs while he continued to drip.  I was given the Lelo Liv  in green for the holidays from a friend this year, and she is kind of perfect for these "legs together" positions.

Fingered

I don't know exactly when, but shortly after the wax Master started fingering me.  My cunt was so hungry for his dick, but his fingers felt so amazingly-squirtingly-good to me.  I'm getting wet just thinking about it again.  He used one hand to hold my legs high above my head, and the other hand to fuck my pussy.  I could tell that he was getting worked up too, because it didn't take long from there for him to just take his hand out, and stick his dick inside of me.

Purr.

During Fucking

Master does not typically take pictures during the actual fucking, but he got a couple this time.  You couldn't see much though, because my "Mermaid tail" gets in the way.  Oddly, I didn't notice him taking almost any of these pics.  Just one.  I must have been out of it.  (Not a bad thing).

Rope Marks

Master got a picture of my rope marks too.  He says they are pretty.  I agree.  I wish rope marks hung around longer, like bruises.  Still, what a fun time.  Afterwards, I actually managed to get some sleep that night.  I had been completely unable to sleep the night before, so this was just the trick I needed.  Move over, melatonin.  Bondage is the new medicine.

New Year's Weekend

This past weekend went pretty well, all things considered.  The Monday before the long weekend I was working out, and I felt a muscle tear in my leg.  I iced it, stayed off it, applied Tiger Balm, put an Ace bandage on it, and took anti-inflammatories.  As you can tell, I've pulled a muscle or two in my time.  Well, by Friday it wasn't getting better, so Master took me to the local Urgent Care, as my doctor couldn't see me until after the new year.  After poking my sore leg this way and that, the doctor decided I strained my gracilis really well.  Awesome.  He gave me Valium for the intense muscle spasms, and told me that I could walk on it, or do anything I wanted - except for work out.  No cardio or strength training until this coming Friday.  Ok, works for me.  At least I know when I can be active again.

Master and me went home, and he settled me into my kitty nest.  Of course, as it turns out, I'm allergic to Valium.  Friday was a long night.

Saturday I woke up ready to have fun.  Master was up before me, and once he was up we ran out to get some mead.  Master had decided that he wanted mead while he played Skyrim, and what better drink for the New Year?  We piled into the car, and decided we were going to go on a little drive, since it was so gorgeous out.  On our drive, we noticed a little sex toy shop.  I honestly could not tell you the name.  We decided to go inside.

The shop itself was a dingy little shop, with Help Wanted signs all over the place.  We went inside and started looking around.  I whispered to Master that if there was anything he saw he liked, I could probably find it online cheaper than here, so to just point it out to me.  Truth was, everything had about a 50% markup on the prices I'm used to.  Still, we just wanted to look around.  As we came around to the front of the store, I noticed one of the workers was grinning and staring at me.  I wasn't in the mood for consistent "eves dropping" on Master and my conversation, so I just looked over to him and said:

"You're staring at me.  Did you need something?"

"Yeah, can I just see your I.D.  You look about 12."

Of course I laughed it off, and Master handed the man my I.D.  (He keeps it in his wallet, not mine.)  He said that was fine, and let us keep walking around.  Of all the things in the store, there was really only a set of nipple clamps that either of us found remotely interesting.  As we left the store, I was a bit annoyed.  Yeah, I get that my ears make me look a lot younger than I am.  Still, 12?  Come on.  Does a twelve year old have D cup breasts?  I don't know why, but I was just annoyed.

It is wonderful to look younger than my age.  When I am 50, I'll probably look 35.  That's great.  Sometimes though, I just get annoyed with the hassle I go through to enjoy things that I have a right to enjoy.  I know that he had a duty to make sure I wasn't a child, but at the same time, I just wasn't in the mood to handle it that day.

We got into the car, and headed back towards the apartment, this time on a mission to stop off for some mead.  We stopped at a nearby liquor store, and Master let me wander around and look at things.  Liquor stores are one of the few stores in which he lets me do this.  I think he is hoping that other liquors will tempt me, and I'll become more interested in drinking.  Don't get me wrong, I like to drink.  But, for me, it's much more of an occasional thing.

After I wandered around, I found Master, who was still pouring over the labels on the mead bottles.  He's not a fan of fruity flavors, so he was trying to find a mead that was just honey.  Not only did he find one, he found a local brand!  Huzzah!  We headed towards the counter, and Master put the bottle up for the woman to ring in.  He paid for our mead, and as we were about to leave, I reached for the bottle.  I usually carry packages or bags out of stores for Master.  It's just one of my duties.  The woman stopped me, and said that Master had to carry it, because she hadn't checked my I.D.

::Headdesk::

I don't know why, but, again I was perturbed.  I've talked about being mistaken for someone underage in the past, and really, I usually don't care.  I've even been denied liquor after showing people my I.D. because they are sure I'm using a fake I.D.  I never have, and I understand their desire to not get in trouble, but it just was not my day to be in the mood for that again.  I smiled outwardly, and Master carried the bottle to the car.  I was really angry inside though, because I am of legal age, and I should absolutely be carrying that bottle, not Master.  I exist to make his life easier, and while I know he wasn't bothered as much as me by his carrying the bottle to the car, I was bothered enough for the both of us.

Despite that, we drove home relatively peacefully, with only minor gripes on my part about the bottle incident.  Master and me had lunch, and mainly spent the day watching Harry Potter movies.  We didn't finish them all, but it was a fun little "marathon" for us.  We traded off between movies and video games.  Master wanted me to rest my leg, and so we did not wind up having sex.  Boo.

I will say that each year, New Year's is just the silliest celebration to me.  I know that a lot of people love staying up late and enjoy bringing in the new year, but I could care less.  I would much rather be asleep by ten and just wake up to the New Year.  Master is different.  He told me that the New Year's Eve kiss is one of the most important things to him, as far as holidays go.  Knowing that, it's difficult to not want to stay up late..  But it really is just something I do for him.  It was difficult, and involved plenty of caffeine, but I managed it.  We kissed and snuggled at midnight, and then Master tucked me into bed, saying that he was glad he could start the year off right.  I am glad that I could do that little thing for him, and glad that it made him happy.

Happy New Year

Welcome 2012, and goodbye to 2011.

2011 was filled with lots of awesome things.  We met lots of cool local people.  We explored Denver, climbed mountains, and had lots of fun.

But, it was also filled with lots of sad things.  Saying goodbye to our little Samantha, cancer, illness and injury for both Master and me, car accidents, busted xboxes, and more.

I do not know what 2012 has in store for Master or me.  I don't know if it'll be a good year, a bad year, a mix of both.  Whatever comes though, I know that Master and me will be ready to take that journey together.  Whatever will come: good, bad, ugly, we will face and enjoy or overcome, as we always do.

Whatever the year holds for you, I wish you the same.  I wish for you to be able to endure, overcome, experience joy, learn from your mistakes, and be happy no matter what.  I wish you all the love, joy, and goodwill you deserve in 2012.

May it be a wonderful year for us all!

Xoxoxo,

Kitten

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