Being a camgirl, I have run into many people who don’t understand what I do. Very few people are even very respectful once they find out I do live sex shows on camera. Cam work has been stigmatized so much and it’s difficult to find anyone who will view me on the same level they previously did before they find out I’m a sex worker.
One thing that bothers me a lot is that people assume that if I am a camgirl, I must be up for pretty much anything. They assume “camgirls” are the same as “phone sex operators” or “prostitutes” or “escorts” or that we’re just crazy and wild and that we’re going to exhibit all sorts of kinky behaviors no matter where we are. That’s right, if you’re hanging out at the pool you’re obviously going to take your top off, after all, who cares about ethics or morals or who sees?
Sex work is a job like any other. I may enjoy being on cam quite a bit, but that doesn’t mean that when I’m off the clock I’m going to do raunchy things just because the people I am hanging out with are small-minded. Sex workers do not exist to put on shows for you at your whim.
I think a lot of the problems really exist in the fact that most sex work is hidden away. It’s not the sort of thing you talk about with just anyone because most people can’t handle it for a variety of reasons. Religion, social stigma, unrealistic expectations, and just plain ignorance lead to awkward conversations that are frustrating on a variety of levels.
I’m a camgirl. That means that I perform shows on my web cam, from home. I do a variety of shows but there are a lot of things I do not do both because the website I work for does not allow them, and also because there are certain things I am opposed to doing on camera for safety reasons. (For example, I do not do self bondage). Some camgirls are also phone sex operators. That means that they will phone you while they cam with you. I don’t do phone. There are many people who offer phone sex with no camera at all, those are the people who you typically think of when you think of phone sex operators.
There are many variations on sex workers. Some people work in porn, some are escorts, some are prostitutes, camgirls, camboys, strippers. Some are sexual surrogates, some perform in peep shows, and more. There are many of us out there, and you likely have met someone who is a sex worker without even knowing it!
What should you do if someone confides in you that they work in the sex industry? Be respectful. There is nothing wrong with sex work, and there is nothing wrong with your curiosity. Most of us do not mind polite questions, just be sure to keep your judgements to yourself. And please remember, just because someone has told you what they do for a living, it does not mean that they are okay with you sharing that information around.
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