Feeling Better

::Knock on wood::  I’m feeling better than I was in my last post.  We even managed to narrowly avoid an ER trip.  Whew!  Always feels good when we manage that.  It was one of those weekends where it took extra long to get everything done, but you know what?  I managed all the errands with Master and that is the important thing.

Yesterday I ran around like a chicken and cammed, did laundry, dishes, got stuff ready for dinner (but, the main event included grilling, so Master was the one who actually “cooked” dinner.  He enjoys grilling a lot), etc.  It was nice.

I used to be really good at falling asleep at ten, because we’ve worked on it for a long time with my bed time, but sleeping is just really hard right now.  While the medicine I take helps me to be more functional and have better blood pressure..  It also keeps me awake.  Insomnia is a common side effect and it’s not really something that sort of goes away as you take it.  I mean, maybe it is, but I took this for five months before and in that time I really only got one decent night’s sleep per week at best.  We’re hoping that maybe it will dissipate with time but in the meantime it’s here full force.  I don’t recall a time in the last couple of weeks that I actually fell asleep before 2AM.  I’m just completely wired and wide awake.  Master had been letting me get up if I can’t fall asleep and sit quietly in the other room on the Wii U until I was sleepy, and that kind of works, but it’s not the best thing on my neck (as I was just using the handheld controller with the screen, and not the TV so as to be extra quiet).

So, last night Master put my restraints on, and then let me sit up sewing.  Not only did he let me sit up sewing, he actually encouraged it.  I felt so, so bad.

“You can stay up and come to bed when you’re sleepy.”

He even put my squeeze light out in the kitchen for me.  So, off I went.  I think it works out better when I sit up sewing because then I’m focusing on a task, which made me sleepy about an hour earlier than I had been getting to bed, recently.  Still, I feel guilty.  I think the only reason Master is encouraging me to stay up until I’m tired is probably because even though I try to be still and quiet in the bed, I toss and turn a bit, and I know that’s disturbing his sleep too.  He wasn’t at all mad at me, or even remotely upset sounding, but it’s weird breaking with tradition a bit.  Hopefully we get back to my old bed time later.  I already miss it.

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