Driving Master

Ever since the car accident, however minor it was, I’ve been absolutely terrified of driving.  As I’ve mentioned before, I will yelp and cry out loud in the car, without meaning too.  Hell, if a car so much as puts its break lights on, I am just terrified.  Because of this, I have not really driven in the year and a half since we got the car.  Occasional trips to the grocery store, but nothing else really.

This has been one area where Master has not pushed me really.  He is very supportive whenever I say I’m up for driving, but he never volunteers me for it.  Last week we were supposed to go visit our friends Masterofslavej and jenpet.  They live pretty far away from us, and I sort of asked Master if I could drive.  He agreed that would be a good idea, and he seemed almost too excited about it.  I guess I can’t blame him.  I figured a ride to see Masterofslavej and jenpet would be easy on me, because it was mainly going to be long stretches of highway.

Since the drive was going to be very long (over two hours) we decided to go through the McDonald’s drive through to get Master and me drinks.  I got a small sweet tea and Master got a large coke.  That was the only time I cried the whole trip!  It wasn’t full on bawling either, but going through the drive through scared the bejeezus out of me.  I was scared I’d be too close, or too far away, or…?  As it figures I made it through fine, and then we were off on our magical adventure of driving.

Getting out of Denver was the hardest part.  There were lots of stops and starts and lane changes.  I’m still not confident about lane changing.  Not one bit.  We made it though, and before long we were on the sixty or seventy miles of just plain highway.  I liked that part.  Master kept trying to convince me I wanted to be in the fast lane, but whenever I got in the fast lane I panicked.  I didn’t like it at all.  I made it through though!

We got to our destination, and I was super, super proud of myself.  I could never, ever have done it without Master, but I did make it through.  Being the driver for that long has given me some of my driving confidence back.  I’m going to drive around town more, and I know I’ll be fine, well, as long as Master is there I will be.  I’m not ready yet to drive on my own, but I know I will be.

The biggest reason why I’m trying so hard to be a confident driver is because if there’s an emergency and for some reason Master can’t drive, this should be a skill that I have.  It is ridiculous to me, that I’ve let this take over so much of my life.  The truth is, that I never really leave home without Master.  Not right now anyway.  He drives me everywhere I need to go.  I used to work outside the house though, and I would drive myself through Boston each morning.  I want to get back to that.  I know with practise that I will.