My hands are starting to get better now, and so I’m going to be doing a bit of blogging again. I’m not sure it’ll be a blog post per day, as I’m trying to keep my typing to no more than thirty minutes a day for now, and I also have to help edit reviews for students I mentor over on EdenFantasys. But still, it’ll be nice to be back. Even if it is going to take me a day or two to type one blog.
Things over here are not going so well. I don’t know what is in the water in our new town, but I managed to break one of the long bones in my toe. It’s not a massive break, but it is a clean break. I managed to get an avulsion fracture, while Master and me were goofing off. Master tweeted about it when it happened, so a lot of people on Twitter have heard, although, typing how it happened takes more than 140 characters.
Basically, Master and me were just getting dinner ready, when my Mom called. We figured we could chat for a minute, so we didn’t hang up on her. While we were talking, I was standing in the kitchen practicing kicks (think cheerleader style). Well, Master is a super silly guy and he thought that what I was doing looked like fun so he started to do some kicking too. We were sort of taking turns, he kicks, I kick, etc. Well, I guess we both looked away for a bit, and my foot went up, and his came down right on top of my (pointed) big toe. There was really no way to stop mid-swing, so right behind my big toe got the brunt of the hit.
I actually screamed a lot of expletives, and my Mom panicked. She thought I was suddenly enraged or something, so Master talked her down. Har har. He asked me if I could move my toe, I could move it millimeters, but that’s it, and I could barely walk. We hung up with my Mom, and sat down to eat (I had to crawl on my forearms since my wrist was sprained at the time). Master got me an ice pack and we put the rest of the Shrek movie we were watching on, and I put an ice pack on my foot. Well, the swelling was just getting worse and worse, and I had a hard time even getting a sock on my foot. We decided to go to Urgent Care.
Urgent Care took an x-ray immediately and knew right away that I broke it. It’s a pretty obvious (though small) fracture. They put me in a giant boot to my knee, and told me that I wasn’t allowed to put any weight at all on my foot until I saw an orthopedist. It was a long weekend. Very, very long.
Anyway, we went to see the Orthopedist, and he decided that my foot was fine. He said that while it was a clean break, the chip itself was probably small enough to heal on its own if I kept the boot on, and that I didn’t really need crutches. I was so excited that it wasn’t going to be a big deal, and that I could stop using the crutches (which, I had been using on my sprained wrist, thus making it worse). He didn’t even look at my foot, and I only talked to him for about three minutes. He was pretty dismissive.
I was pretty excited nonetheless, and I left his office using the crutches mainly for balance. I couldn’t figure out how to walk without them. Anyway, once we were home I iced it, and just put my foot up, though I didn’t worry about going to the bathroom or getting food, or other small little excursions off the couch.
That night was absolutely terrible. I woke up several times in tears because my foot hurt me so badly. The swelling and pain were back times ten, and I was so upset. Master called the doctor the next day, and his physician’s assistant told him that we probably misunderstood the doctor, and that I should have weaned myself off the crutches, because going cold turkey can be too much work for your foot. Master and me were both a bit annoyed because he didn’t even hint that we should wean me off of the crutches. He flat out said I wouldn’t need them. The pain I was in wasn’t my or Master’s fault. We both blame the doctor for not giving us an accurate timeline for when I should be walking again. At that point, it hadn’t even been a week. The doctor’s solution was just to take two Vicodin every four hours, and now he says I shouldn’t be bearing weight. Honestly, that’s a lot of pain meds and Master and me aren’t really comfortable with that. We’re going to talk to another doctor and get a second opinion. If the second opinion says the same as the first opinion, then fine.. But we’re both worried that this doctor is going to mess my foot up and make the healing process take even longer.
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Alright, here we are a week later. I decided to make this post in parts because:
A) I still don’t know how to unload pictures from the super fancy new camera, and I need Master’s help.
B) I don’t want to make three million posts about how butt-hurt I am that I broke my stupid foot.
Anyway, back to the story. The Orthopedist told me that I should not be in that much pain over such a small bone chip, so he sent me to a podiatrist. Master and me were both happy because:
A) There’s our second opinion.
B) We’d see someone who actually knows plenty about feet in particular, not just bones in general.
New doctor sent me to get an MRI of my foot, and this morning we went and got results. The new doctor was worried that I had hurt my ligaments in the accident, and that I’d need to be off my foot for three months or more. Luckily, that wasn’t the case. He still stands by the initial diagnosis of a broken toe, but got me a prescription for a Roll-A-Bout scooter, which was a lot easier on my hands (because of the sprain). Honestly, if anyone out there is reading this, has a lower leg injury, and needs crutches, seriously, I hope you’ll ask your doctor about the scooter. It’s not super cheap (but, your insurance might cover it), right now we’re paying $25 per week to rent the scooter, but it is a lifesaver on your hands. The turn radius is garbage, but I can get around, even in the middle of the night without putting any weight on my foot or stress on my hands. Happy kitty am I.
After seeing my MRI, the doctor told me that the boot I was given at Urgent Care was too big for me, and that’s probably at least half my problem. Because my foot isn’t being stabilized and held still, it could definitely be aggravating my foot. He is going to try to get his hands on a small foot boot (he says they are hard to come by), and if he can’t find one today, he said he’ll order one and I will definitely have it on Monday. Once I have a boot that’s the right size, I can go ahead and start weaning myself off the scooter and starting to bear weight and walk on it. Nothing crazy, and just ease myself into it.
In the meantime, I have to leave my boot on still, and in four to six weeks I’ll be able to take it off and get my foot in a shoe. I’m looking real forward to a shoe.
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I’ve been able to type for a couple of days, but I’ve honestly been pretty depressed over this. True, it’s not a super serious break, it’ll only be a total of about two months in the boot.. But I’m just frustrated. Each time I get injured, I feel angry that I got hurt again. I feel broken, and just so sad. I didn’t want to tweet or be online, or talk to even friends or family in real life. I just hate that I seem to be getting hurt so much and so often lately. First, it was my hamstring, then my wrist, then I break my foot, then my good wrist gets hurt from the crutches.
I am feeling a lot better now, physically and mentally, but I’m still bummed. Each time I think I’m recovering or almost recovered from an injury, I hurt something else, and none of these injuries seem to fix themselves in a day or two. I guess all these injuries are just leading me to feel a lot of shame, and each time I start to feel cheered up about how much better I’m doing, etc, I get hurt again. I keep telling myself “This has to be the last injury for a while”, or “It can’t be worse than this”, but it can. I just need to accept it, and do my best to heal from it. I need to stop beating myself up over these injuries that I have zero control over. And, I will. Life happens, shit happens, injuries happen. I will get better, I will heal, and I will be even stronger than I was before. Rawr!
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One really fun thing we did get to do was to go to a midnight release of Mass Effect 3! It was the night before a very early Orthopedist appointment, and I was still on crutches at that point. Master wanted to go pretty badly, I wanted to go super badly, but neither of us thought it’d be a good idea for me to crutch my way down the stairs, and then stand for hours at a midnight release. We called ahead and asked if we could bring a chair, and they said yes. (Mind you, they had a bunch up when we got there!)
They had a little soda bar, and were giving away free Monster Energy drinks. I’m not a fan of soda, so Master got me a sweet tea before we showed up. Master, on the other hand, really enjoyed the all-you-can-drink-monsters. It’s funny, I’ve been to a couple of midnight releases before (all with Master), and none of them were like this! I went to Fable 2, ME2, Dragon Age 2, and Skyrim. Fable 2 and Skyrim were shitty. We were forced to stand outside in the cold until the store opened up at midnight (though, we were told there’d be a party for Skyrim), and then you got your game one person in the store at a time, and left. That was it. No one chatting in line, no excitement, nothing. I actually got the flu when we got Skyrim, because it was so cold out. I honestly don’t remember the ME2 release, though the Dragon Age 2 one was OK. There wasn’t a party, but they kept the place open late, and then handed people their game right at midnight, so you got out of the store immediately, rather than paying at midnight, and waiting in a long line.
Anyway, this time was way different! There were a lot more people there, and they were doing trivia and games to give away swag all night! It was fun, I didn’t get called on to answer any trivia questions (though, I had my hand raised for lots of them). Master and me each won a bunch of stuff anyway. I pretended to be a thresher maw (basically, I hobbled my way up in front of everyone, and threw my crutches in the air and yelled “RAWR”! I got away with it too, because I won a hat (which I gave to Master), and a graphic novel. Master won a hoodie by doing his best impression of “Morlan”. It was cute. He also won us an alliance water bottle by walking around with the bottle clipped to his head. They had a fem Shep conga line which I couldn’t participate in, but which I managed to get a T-shirt (pity t-shirt really) since I couldn’t join the line. We also managed to win another hoodie for Master. It was insane.
The swag aside, we just met a lot of cool people, and we were all just so excited about the game coming out! It was so fun. Everyone was laughing and having a great time, chatting, dancing, not afraid to be a bit silly. It was awesome. That’s what every midnight release should be like, I think. The swag is cool, but the best part is how happy and excited everyone is. It definitely was a fun night, and I have been giving our new copy of the game plenty of love.