“I Need”
Needs. As a slave, I will still have needs despite my desire for making myself as useful to Master Pravus as possible. Perfect I can never be, and needs must even with Master Pravus driving. When I have a need that is something that can wait, I don’t tend to bring it up immediately. I have mentioned before that I must get permission before spending my allowance on anything, but presents are excluded in this. And I always pause when I think about the needs. I do. I need.
Master Pravus has a habit. It makes me sometimes (often) not want to mention my needs. I’ll say “I’ve been considering purchasing ______” and before I can describe it he will pounce on it like a lion in heat and say “Oh yes! Excellent idea! I’ll buy it instead!” Only, he doesn’t really know what I need, because we haven’t had a discussion, and the wrong item will invariably show up. And then I lose my nerve to try again. But. I really do.. I need.
As I have become more frail I have needed a better way to access my laptop. The biggest problem is that for maybe as long as I have had it, I have had a lap board that I use with it. But the laptop itself was purchased to be just at my lifting limit. This means that I can lift either the board, or the laptop, but not both. And so, if Master Pravus was busy I could sometimes get trapped for too long, unable to get up and down to move around. I could just be pinned there unable to do things. It was not ideal. And sometimes he would leave the house for short bursts and forget, leaving the laptop in my lap.
When we moved into the house, I mentioned the item I felt I needed to Master Pravus and he said “Ohh I know! I know! Let me do this….!” And the thing showed up. And it was the wrong thing again. And I couldn’t use it. Not at all. And I felt disheartened, because I really did need that thing but I didn’t want to mention it again. So I just kept saving up and waiting and waiting and this past week I decided I was going to mention it again. Because: needs must!
“Master, you know that thing for my laptop?”
“I think I know the thing you need now,” he started.
“Wait!” I tried, “Can, I explain first. What I really need is. It has to be shaped like a staple, and it would have a tray for the laptop that would overhang where I sit. Do you see what I mean?”
“Yes! Like this?”
“Yes. But. With wheels. It really needs wheels,” I said.
“I could move it for you,” he pointed out.
“Nooo, I want to be able to move it myself so I can get up and down.”
“Right. All of these are designed for me to move them for you. What the HELL?”
I nodded. But we found one. We did. And look:
It’s the exact right thing that I needed. It’s perfect. I can get up or down by myself. I can move around the house if I need to. My laptop is easy to reach, or easy to move out of the way, and best of all: I can type up blog posts or edit pictures or whatever I want to do now without having to go upstairs if I can’t do that that day. It’s such a relief. Needs are tough, but sometimes they must. And I’m grateful for my overenthusiastic Master Pravus. We always figure things out eventually.