I haven’t updated the blog in a little bit, because we haven’t yet fixed my feeding tube. I’ve been mainly keeping this blog for personal updates, so I haven’t had a lot to say while we wait for my J to be fixed. We do know what’s wrong and how to fix it now, thankfully. The bad news is that several of the surgeons have come down with COVID and there is only one surgeon left at the facility I go to. And since I can technically survive right now, I have to wait on the backburner while some of the more critical patients go ahead of me. I completely understand this approach. If it were me who was critical, I would want to go ahead of me. I’m going to get my feeding tube fixed soon, but not yet. First, (with only one surgeon available) some other patients who are more critical have to go before me while I need to wait with a lot of gauze nearby at all times and I just make do. My time will be soon, though. That’s not what this post is about though. I did want to say something since it has been three weeks though. I’m not magically better, but I’m also not dying. I’m in limbo you could say.
But on to this post! Master Pravus and me were taking pictures for my (xxx) VIP Fanclub when something really sweet happened. I’ve posted many times about how my pupils are pretty dilated most of the time, and that this is a characteristic of my POTS syndrome. I mean. Even when I go to the eye doctor, they don’t normally need to dilate my eyes, they’re just naturally pretty big pupils. It’s not really a very big deal or anything, but a lot of people do either find it a little bit weird or really cool looking. No in-between. ::Laughs:: I guess you either like me or you don’t. ::Shrugs:: Well, one thing is, that when we post to my Fanclub, obviously we set up the nice studio lighting, and it’s pretty bright. That’s one of the few scenarios that my pupils do kind of shrink up in. So most of the time, if I’m in the big studio lighting, it’s really hit or miss as to whether you’ll see my big pupils or not.
In my Fanclub, I’m always happy to take requests. I mean, why wouldn’t I? And someone had asked for some specific shots that happened to partially include Master Pravus and me interacting a little bit and were very close up.
It’s often said that your pupils will dilate when you’re in love with someone. We never really could get pictures of my pupils dilating around Master Pravus because in the dark you don’t really see my eyes dilating (flash would ruin the affect) and he’s not ordinarily interacting with me in my Fanclub pictures. They’re usually solo. Here’s the first three pictures of the recent photoshoot we took though.
At the end of his work day, when I brought him over to show him he couldn’t stop smiling. You can angle your body one way or another. You can kneel or you can smile or you can obey or you can kiss or laugh. But something you can’t control, of course, and when you catch them on camera like that it feels like a piece of treasure. 🙂
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